A place of life exploration, sailing journeys, and piece of thought
(written Wednesday, August 26, 2025)
Today is my first day back to writing in the mornings. Too many late night musings. The book Atomic Habits by James Clear emphasizes the significance of tiny changes to habits. Making time for writing the morning is my tiny change for life.
What is yours?
(written Tuesday, August 26, 2025)
This may sound silly to some, but I just learned that fish don’t just jump when they are being chased. Among other reasons, fish sometimes jump for play!
So as I sit watching the peaceful water, I see a huge fish jump. And then another. I think they are jumping for joy. I jump for joy too! How beautiful.
(written Monday, August 25, 2025)
Setting: a hospital in Maryland.
I was given a gown and told to leave all my belongings (purse, rings, jewelry) in an open box that would be watched in an empty room. After being asked if I needed anesthesia (which I declined), I was taken to the MRI room, a large round machine situated in the middle.
“No, there is no music.” Their speakers hadn’t worked for quite a while.
I was placed in a very uncomfortable position with my painful left thumb propped up for imaging. Lying on my belly, covered with a blanket, I stared awkwardly ahead into the sterile tube. The table slid me forward into the machine. Without anymore explanation than “You’ll hear some knocking noise for the next few minutes until the images are done,” and “Here’s the button if you need to stop,” the young radiology technician exited the room.
What happened next was no mere knocking noise. It was heart-pounding, loud, repetitive but erratic, rat-a-tat-tat! I had not been warned to bring earplugs! Those definitely would have helped! So many times in the subsequent minutes I came close to pushing the quit button. However I needed that imaging, and I did not want to experience this again. Every fiber in my being wanted out of there. I felt angry at the techs and at the hospital for the lack of training these guys appeared to have received. You don’t just stick someone in a tube with noises like that with no idea of how long it has been or how much time is left and nothing to do! That is torture, and it is wrong. I cried motionless tears, for I dared not move a muscle near my hand. I tapped my foot, rolling it around the way I do to get through blood draws. I began counting aloud, slowly from 1 to 100 and then backwards down to 1. I sang hymns and folk songs quietly to myself.
If I remember correctly, the whole thing took 45 minutes. And then suddenly it stopped. There was no communication during the process, just me and my thoughts and the awful “knocking” (hammering). As the table pulled me back to sanity, I wanted to jump out of my skin. I was so on edge.
“You did really well,” the tech said.
No thanks to you!, I thought in my head. “Do you ever have people that experience panic attacks in there?” I asked.
“All the time,” he shared convincingly.
Well, of course they do! How could they do that to people and not change something???
Another day, I had quite the opposite experience at a different radiology clinic, this one a civilian imaging diagnostic center. At least it’s not always such torture, however uncomfortable.
(written Sunday, August 24, 2025)
A rhythm
A pattern
Predictable ways.
We search for stability,
Security, sense of belonging.
Here's to a return of routines and order in life.
(written Saturday, August 23, 2025)
Playing the piano is one of the first things I enjoy doing after we return from a trip. It is not usually the first thing I do. Considering children and luggage, a lot happens before I am able to sit and tickle the ivory. However when the activity slows down and I am able to rest on my small cushioned bench, my fingers find those black and white keys and sing their favorite melodies.
Michele McLaughlin is a regular go-to for me these days. She composed a piece called “Synergy” that I have played through many times. It is one of the more intricate pieces in her book that I own, requiring both the right and left hands to play together but almost separate melodies much of the time. A beautiful interplay between the two hands, it has challenged me to develop a listening ear for both melodies. When I first began playing the piece, I emphasized the left hand melody, almost dominating over the right hand. After my left thumb injury, my left hand was much weaker, and, frustrated, I let my right hand take the lead. With time, however, I grew to treasure the main tune that the right hand held and understood more of the subtleties of the left. After a year, my left hand has pretty much returned to my previous skill level. Now I notice a richer sound as my hands balance and blend together.
Experiment, injury, rehab, and return. It is a fascinating journey. Often frustrating and emotional, set backs seem often to propel us forward into heights we were incapable of entering before. It happens to athletes, academias, writers, and musicians. I daresay it is a phenomenon that occurs in all walks of life.
(written Friday, August 22, 2025)
Sixteen years
Flew by so fast
We kept in touch
Via Christmas cards
But how does one truly know
Life events that bring joy and pain
When one is not witness of such things?
And yet with one sweet four-hour gathering
It seemed the years were but days.
Sisters in Christ,
United through faith
We shared from our hearts
Past joys and trials
And blessed were
Our families for
Gathering.
(written Thursday, August 21, 2025)
How delightful when someone shares their passion for a topic and invites others to share in their excitement too. We visited the Clearwater Marine Aquarium (CMA) recently, and one of the volunteers engaged me about her experience working there. She shared with such ease and joy. Clearly she enjoys what she does as she helps care for marine animals who have been injured. The aquarium’s motto is Rescue, Rehab, Research, Release. Their hospital services are so vital to the health of the animals that they have an assigned group to stay during a hurricane, as a couple of their buildings are built to withstand hurricane force winds.
CMA seems like a great place to volunteer where newbies are welcome. It certainly is a fascinating place to visit!
(written Wednesday, August 20, 2025)
When I was in college, I spent a summer working in a factory. I walked through the manual labor part of the line to an inner office area with no windows where the number crunchers and paper filers and problem solvers worked. When I accepted the job through the temp agency, I thought I would work in the front office with some light of day and a professional attire environment. I admit I felt a bit disappointed and definitely overdressed in my nice pants and blouse. The motley crew of “the back” intimidated me somewhat because of how different they were from my expectations. One employee even verbally expressed his prediction that I would never return as I was clearly out of my element with “the scaries”. Once I heard that, I knew I must rise to the challenge. After all, they were people and I was a person too. I had no idea how those next couple of months would change my life and understanding of people. My heart was full when I left at the end of summer.
I hope to share more about those experiences and people another time.
(written Monday, August 18, 2025)
Sometimes I miss being in my twenties or thirties. When we hit our forties, everything starts changing. That can be frustrating to accept, at least for me it is. Life is just a whole lot different now than it was a couple decaes ago – busy life with older children involved in school and activities, changing skin, health appointments to keep track of, changing health of family and friends…
So I have found great joy in watching movies like Top Gun Maverick or Mission Impossible: Dead Reckoning or even James Bond: No Time to Die. These movies seem to have aged with me and provide a gravitas to otherwise fast-speed, youthful adventure films. The main characters each face age and the responsibilities of being an older person. We still adventure on as we age, but we approach life with more perspective, richer stories.
(written Sunday, August 17, 2025)
We drove along the highway, peppered with downpours and sunshine, just skirting the center of the summer thunderstorms. Perhaps the result of Hurricane Erin? Suddenly a child exclaimed, “A rainbow!” Sure enough it was a bright skittles-worthy rainbow, just a piece at first. As we watched, a full rainbow appeared and then a double. We were all taken by the beauty and majesty of this rainbow out our window. Storms to the right of us and gorgeous rainbow to the left of us. Then as the sun began to set above the storm clouds, the warm decline stretched from one side of the van to the other, almost encircling us with soft yellow and orange and blues. God’s rainbow bent a kiss to our family as we journeyed through the countryside.
Leader
Will you lead through the fire?
What when the fire dies?
Who are you leading and do you know your why?
Do you promote yourself above others?
Or do you look and see others, weaving talents together to yield a cloth of multiplied strength?
Deceptive is the idea that the best leader is one most skilled in his craft (be it flying a plane, designing technology, etc).
Perhaps leading others is a skill in itself.
Look just below the highest performing worker… for the one who watches, observes, encourages, challenges the team to grow.
Can an intrinsically skilled leader of people lead in multiple contexts, regardless of his/her specific job training?
Leader, lead people and know why you lead.
Life is Sailing 